Memo to: Aubrey Huff

Dude, you can try and create any scenario you want, but that was just bad baserunning on your part when Manny made that great catch on Wednesday.  "We needed a run...it was a lucky catch...I knew if he caught it I'd be out, but if he didn't, I could score..."  Whatever, bro.  You got doubled off of first base on a ball hit to the wall.  True, that.

Memo to: Danny Briere and the Flyers

I have a 1:10 pm tee time at Mountain  Branch on Monday if you want to join me.  You'll have plenty of free time next week.

Memo to: Bob Carpenter, Nats TV

Thanks for talking Washington Nationals baseball with me on today's show.  It was a pleasure to have a broadcast voice of one our local teams on the air to talk about the club.  Hope the team's rights holders don't file some kind of legal action against you.  Oh, that's right, you work for the rights holder. 

Memo to: Freddie Bynum

Keep doing what you're doing.  We know you're not going to hit .300 all year, but just maintain that good work defensively and hit .250 or so and we'll be thrilled - for now.

Memo to: Miguel Tejada

What gives?  You left the Orioles and they're over .500 at the quarter-mark.  And, you left the Orioles and suddenly you're hitting .335 again and YOUR team is above .500 as well.  I know, I know...it's a long story.

Memo to: Jason Campbell

A friend of mine who's a PR rep for a national men's deodorant wants to know if you'd be interested in going to Tampa next February and doing the whole "radio row" thing during Super Bowl week.  It pays well and at least you'll get a first-hand glimpse into what a madhouse the Super Bowl is...

Memo to: George Sherrill

You've done a helluva job, my man.  Seriously.  You COULD be the team's MVP at the 40-game mark, you've been that good.  But, Ms. Marks is right, you DO look just like Charlie Brown when you're on the mound.  Do something with that hat you wear.

Memo to: Terry Francona

Don't take any more in-season vacations.  Your replacement might have cost you a game in Baltimore on Wednesday.

Memo to: Roger Goodell

I don't blame you one bit for trying to sweep this "filming issue" under the rug.  Your league's staying power with the fans hinges greatly on two things: fantasy and betting.  And it's tough for Joe Fan to bet on the games when he thinks one of the teams (or more) has an advantage over the other because they know how to cheat.  Keep sweepin', Rog.

Memo to: Jim Leyland

Well, Craig Monroe wasn't the problem.  Now what?

Memo to: Daniel Cabrera

Nice work so far this season.  I'm going to shelve the "5-walk Danny" moniker for now.  But I'll have to keep using "2-Dinger Danny" for another week or so just to aggravate Bob Haynie who lost 5 Royal Farms coffees to me when you served up those two gopher balls on Wednesday.  You know Bob, right?  He's the mid-day guy on WNST who's been voted Baltimore's best sports talker.  Oh, that's right, you're not allowed to talk to him because we don't pay the team.  My bad, amigo. 

Memo to: Annika Sorenstam

I fully believe you'll be back at some point to chase after Kathy Whitworth's wins record.  If you stay retired, though, it should be noted that you rescued the LPGA Tour with your great play.  Paula Creamer should send you a check every month, in fact.

Memo to: Jay Payton

I remember seeing you in the locker room last August and you were absolutely miserable.  I like seeing this energized version of Jay Payton we're getting in '08.  Good stuff.

Memo to: Andy MacPhail

I'm sending you an invoice for the marketing work I've done for the club so far this season and I'm wondering if you'd rather just send me the money via PayPal instead of going through the hassle of cutting me a check.  I'm good either way.  It's a little over $40,000, if you need to know for budgeting purposes. 

Memo to: Dale Earndardt, Jr.

Try dipping your cat's right foot in olive oil and then rubbing the foot on your steering wheel for good luck.  What the hell, you're not winning doing it your way.  Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good, anyway.

Memo to: Danny Briere

Almost forgot, I also have a tee-time on Tuesday at 1:10 pm at Mountain Branch if you want to join me that day as well.